113. Fake

i'm back. let's see how long my attention span will last tonight.....


observation: typing with fake nails on a laptop sucks balls.

my mom has a wonderful lady that does massages and nails - she's even going to be doing the flowers for my wedding! she gave my mother something called a fiber wrap on her nails to help them grow faster and stronger. i wanted to get something like this. i'm a nail biter and i have no problem with this - but it means i don't have the prettiest nails. not that cared very much but i thought i'd be nice to have them looking halfway decent for the wedding. i decided to get a fiber wrap too.

now granted - i was a dumbass. i didn't do the proper research. i walked into one of the many nail salons this town has to offer and asked if they did fiber wraps - okay - i forgot it was called a fiber wrap and i asked for a nail wrap. regardless - the lady inside said they could do this service. never having had anything done to my nails - ever - i had no idea what to expect.

so i sat there. i sat there while this lady did a bunch of crap to my nails. while she spoke in a language i didn't recognize to her other co-worker. while she spoke on her cell phone to her friends. so awkward. it was one of those things where i knew i should have said something or just left but i thought i was getting what i asked for. and having no one speak english to me for more than few sentences kinda threw me off my guard. and in the end i ended up with fake gel nails. and while they're not long long - they're long to me and driving me nuts. plus i woke up at 1am from my fingers being in so much pain!

all morning at work i searched for a place to remove them. out of about 18 nail salons in the area only one spoke english and actually understood what i was asking when i called. unfortunately they didn't provide gel nail removal. and all the while i'm hearing/reading stories about how incredibly painful the removal process is and how bad these gel (powder gel) nails are. how awful my nails are going to look when i get them removed. how they aren't going to be healed in time. how i'm going to be in severe pain. good god. finally a co-worker suggested i call the beauty school in town. i do and low and behold they speak english! the lady in charge of the nail department explained the process to me - that they don't soak and pop off the nail - they file it down. and that the only way it would be painful is if someone filed too deep. but she promised that they would leave a very thin layer of the gel on (not enough to notice) but enough not to hurt my actual nail.

i have an appointment tomorrow right after work. i cannot wait! i can't stand having this shit on my nails. i woke up this morning and scratched an itch in my nose - gave myself a freaking nose bleed. once these things are off i'll attempt to be kind to my nails and perhaps get a little manicure before the big day but after that - bring on the nail biting. there are far worse habits i could have.....


now that that is off my chest....


the wedding is right around the corner! i can't believe it! not too much left to do....

friday kristin is coming over to help me burn cd's for the favors. i ordered a bunch of cd packaging kits that should be really cute so i'm excited. now if i could actually make the playlist for those cd's.....

i had another dress fitting this past saturday. the dress still fits. i could stand to lose a bit of back fat - more on that in a minute. as i was standing there looking at my dress i couldn't help but notice those annoying bits of chub right next the arm-pit. it's like a mini-boob. yuck. i asked the lady helping me out there was anyone out there who did not have those. she said even the really skinny girls have them becuase the corset bra pushes everything up up up. then she looked at me and said 'you know - i don't think you need that corset bra!'. so she took it off and wow! the dress looked so much better! those bits of chub went from being the size of a small plum to being the size of a little walnut :) what a relief! and it saved me $80 on that damned bra :) yay!

i only have one more appointment before the wedding! luckily kelly will be at this one - she's going to learn how to do the bustle on the dress. thanks kelly!! :)

back to fat - back fat that is. (i'm lame - i know this) after seeing the back of me i made a pledge. i do the treadmill about 3 times a day for 20 minutes a shot. i usually get up each morning and do one of these bouts. only now i do 3 sets of 20 push-ups before the treadmill and 3 sets of 20 after. i started on sunday night and have stuck to it :) and you know - i thought it would be arms and shoulders where i'd feel it - but nope - it's my abs! nice to know i'm working more than i thought i was :)


alright. i'm gonna go get ready for bed. i can't take anymore of this fake nail typing. hopefully tomorrow goes well!

93. 9:54 a.m.

i'm more awake now. not enough to think of a more creative title though....


how about an update?


- i had a dress fitting appointment this past saturday. you might remember me mentioning that last time i tried on the dress i had about six boobs. that is gone. it fits! i need to tone up my arms a bit more and could probably stand to lose an inch around my middle but that shouldn't be a problem at all. very happy :)
- chris and i looked at more tux's and i think i've finally made up my mind. :)
- i've ordered my bouquet. not going to say anything yet other than it's not flowers. and that i'm very excited about it.
- i found a guestbook on etsy that's super cute and was only $10 :)
- the invitations were mailed - i mentioned that. when we came back from duluth this weekend we already had 3 RSVP's! :)


hmmm.....


guess that's all i can manage right now. i think my spurt of being semi-awake is fading and i'm now starting to daydream about a nap after work. ah...sleep... :)

65. What have I been doing?

good question. wish i had an answer.


oh wait. i do. getting fat. the kind of fat where you can feel your belly jiggle when you shouldn't feel your belly jiggle. the kind of fat that makes you wish sweatpants were acceptable attire for the work place. the kind of fat that despite making me feel like complete and utter shit anchors me to my couch.


would someone like to feed me? as in the way your pets get fed. only a certain amount in the morning and a certain amount in the evening. basic nutrients - nothing fancy. no ability to snack. i'd also like someone to volunteer as a drill sergeant. make me work out. make me. please.


at the rate i'm going my wedding dress is going to be displayed on a mannequin as it will impossible for me to fit into without looking like a whale. that is if chris still feels like marrying someone who is a foot shorter but is going to weigh more than him soon.


depressing.


on to other things......


i knocked a stone out of my engagement ring! luckily i was able to find it - such a tiny stone buried in our shaggy bathroom rug! it should be back on my finger again by friday.


i've been getting massively insane headaches that make me want to chop off my head. i've also discovered that imatrex may as well be a sugar cube for the amount of relief it brings me.


humidifiers for adults are incredibly boring. beige. so i bought the one intended for kids - it's a red dragon :)


i bought the humidifier in hopes that it will relieve my eye problem. since friday my eyes have been so painfully dry that having them open fully hurts. eye drops make it worse as they burn my eyes and turn them red.


i could power a car i'm so fucking full of gas. sorry if that is too much information. but seriously. what is wrong with me? no major changes in diet - just full of gas. stress? it's embarrassing. and i just shared it with the world luckily only a few people read this.....


hmmm. perhaps bloated gassiness is related to such a high weight number. fingers crossed. gas easier to get rid of then fat. but i still must get rid of lots of fat. not to be thin but to be healthy.


i think i've figured out what i want to do for our wedding invitations. now if i could just remember to order the supplies!


speaking of the wedding. not that anyone has to bring a gift but...the plates we registered for (at macy's are more than 50% off right now!)


tomorrow chris turns 36! he's in duluth right now which gave me plenty of time to make his cake and wrap his gifts :) (hmmmm....licking the cake batter bowl was probably not good way to lose weight)


chris and i are merging. we are now on the same health insurance. car insurance. renters insurance. we also decided to drop our cable. realized we were becoming mindless drones and also that cable was a major distraction from other things we should be doing - uhhh...like...working out for instance.


we signed up for netflix. probably not going to be good in the distraction area. ah well. tomorrow we should be getting a documentary about the south pole. sex and the city season one and the sopranos season one (i've seen all be the last season and so help me god if anyone ruins it for me.....)


despite vowing to make christmas gifts this year we've instead bought a lot. guess i'll sell those 150 coasters i made......


i'm currently in the process of making five different knitted/crocheted projects. hopefully they get done soon.


it's now 10:53 and i really should be going to bed if i have any hope of getting my larded self out of bed in the morning and on the treadmill before work! i'm hoping my little dragon helps my eye problem and therefore allows a better nights sleep!

11. I Can't Sleep....

i have a week day off. i long for these days - when i can sleep in. instead i find myself up at 6am...and having nightmares about my wedding dress!


i have that pit of regret feeling in my stomach. not about buying the dress (so calm down mom - cause i can see the look of panic on your face from here!). i love my dress. the only thing i regret is not trying on more. i would have still bought the same dress but it's just that i was really getting into the whole fun of it all and i just wish i had tried on more - especially while my mom was down. i mean - you only get to do this once in your life....


it'll pass. it comes and goes. i just wish it would pass now so i could fall back asleep!

9. It's Here!!

my wedding gown has arrived!!!


i just got the notice in the mail today and cannot wait to go look at it :) it'll be awhile before i start any alterations though - gotta get in shape!


and just in case you were wondering - i was torn between these two dresses before - but i ultimately decided to go with this little number. i know i called it a gown but..oh well. what do you all think?

p.s. totally kidding on that. i wouldn't wear that even if i did have the body - good god.